I love my wife Niki Winston! She is amazing and I feel the same way about her now as I did when we were first married, and my love for her has even grown! Many people ask how do we do it after almost 10 years, 4 kids, and tons of ministry and life responsibility. Well the first answers are obvious: prayer, selfless love, and being committed to God... but the second is DATING!

I cannot stress this enough to married couples:
If you want to keep the marriage DATE YOUR WIFE (or husband)! How can you keep something growing if you don't pay attention to it? Dating is like watering the flower of your marriage ? . When I say dating I mean spending concentrated time outside of the house together. No kids, no work, no household tasks, no distractions. Doesn't matter so much of what you do, just do it TOGETHER. Make it a priority. For real for real.

Just because you are in the same room with your spouse doesn't mean that you all are spending quality time together. Roommates can do be in the same room, but experience little to no connection at all. It's like you bringing a pitcher of water and setting it next to the flower of your marriage...just because the water is in close proximity doesn't mean that the flower is actually receiving water. Many couples get so used to being around each other that they forget to be WITH each other. Then over time the other person changes (which life will naturally do to you) and you will feel like your spouse is a stranger - Because you were NOT consistently getting to know them again every week as they changed. But dating will keep you close. Locked in. On par with their changes, challenges, desires, heart shifts, passions, and serious warning signs.

Niki and I have had dozens of DEEP meaningful conversations that brought out important points...where did they happen? DATE NIGHT. Away from the noise and distractions of life - In a focused and intimate conversation. Niki and I try to date once a week. We have to make time for it. We eat out, go to plays, shop, walk around town, travel occasionally, go to a movie, go to dance class/karaoke, etc. If you are on a budget, there are low cost options too: walking in the park, taking a bike ride, picnics, library (yes I said library lol)... you get the idea. Just do something! It's critically important if you want to divorce-proof your marriage. You can never grow something that you refuse to pay attention to. 

If you WANT your marriage, treat it like so. Date your spouse and never let go. ❤️
~ David
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​Yesterday, I got the most AMAZING revelation and I just had to take a moment to share it with you! I was in the middle of teaching a message on receiving God's love (you can listen to it below). We know that God's love is limitless and unconditional towards us. And as I was teaching the message at our weeklyGo Hard for Christ youth service, this revelation hit me like a truck! This is what happened in the few minutes leading up to it. I asked our teenagers a simple question:

How do you feel loved by other people close to you?

I got all kinds of different answers. I feel loved...
"When people are honest."
"When people say nice things to me."
"When they encourage me!"
"When they are loyal to me."
"When they are looking out for me."
"By the way they take care of me!"
"When they give me things."
"When they go out of their way to do certain things for me."
The list went on and on... then the revelation hit! 

If that's how you feel most loved by other people, how do you expect to feel loved by God if you don't allow him to do those same things to you and for you? 

God is capable of doing each one of those things listed. God is love, and every scenario that we can come up with on how we feel loved will lead back to something that God did first and does best! God is love and He wants to love us unconditionally! But it's our job to put ourselves in the proper place so that we can receive God's love, and not reject His love. So ask yourself, how do I feel most loved by people? Then take inventory and see if you have allowed God to love you in that same way.

Several years ago my wife introduced me to something that changed my life forever. It changed how I viewed my relationship with my wife and with others. It also helped me to discover more about myself. It is called the five love languages - based on a popular book The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It's a great way to find out how you most feel loved by others. I found out that the way I most feel loved by my wife is words of affirmation and acts of service from her towards me. Amazingly, when I applied those things to my relationship with God, I found out that the same holds true. I feel so loved by God when he affirms me by speaking to me, and even receiving prophetic words from others. When God says those things to me I write them down and I go back to read them often. Then when God does things for me to make things easier or better in my life, that's just the icing on the cake. When He sends people to me to help serve the mission that he's given me, it expresses His love towards me. Even thinking about Jesus dying on the cross for me speaks love to me because it was the ultimate act of service and sacrifice.

Take the test and find out what your most dominant love languages are! 

​If receiving a gift from someone makes you feel most loved, then how will you ever feel loved by God if you never choose to receive his blessings in your life? You MUST receive those gifts/blessings from God. Or if you are a person that translates love as spending quality time together, then it is of utmost importance for you to spend TIME with God, in His presence. If you don't, you might find yourself not feeling loved by God -- not because God has stopped loving you, but because you have not put yourself in proper position to receive His love. If loyalty and faithfulness are important, then it is important that you trust God especially in the hardest seasons of your life. It is then that God can show His faithfulness towards you and the resulting feeling will be love! 

I believe this principle holds the key to TRULY receiving God's love. And as it says in 1 John 4:10, "In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us..." Receiving God's love is how you put yourself into a position to live the blessed life that He's promised.
~David ​
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When the Bible uses the word offended it is translated from the original Greek word ‘skandalizo’. It literally translates “to fall into a trap.” This is where we get our current English word scandalous. When I think about the state of our county and culture,  it seems like everyone is offended at something. But if offended can be translated as falling into a trap, then we have to ask the question, who is behind setting up all of these traps?…Because that’s all they are. TRAPS. How many of us have unknowingly gotten caught up in a trap, whether personal or political, and then asked ourselves how did we get into this mess? Things have gotten messy for sure. But when you choose to walk in love, you are choosing freedom over entrapment. Love repels offense, and is the pathway to your freedom. 

Don’t be a victim to the Enemy’s traps in media, culture, politics, religion, news, and anything else you can think of. Walk in love, like Jesus did. That's the only way you can live above all of the foolishness in this world today. That's how you can be free from the trap. #FreefromtheTrap

​~ David

P.S. Here is a message below that I did after posting this blog, giving more explanation to the point I am making, and giving you 3 steps on how to frogive.

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​Recently I posted on my Instagram account asking people for their suggestions on blog topics. I got a lot of good responses, but one topic was consistent: LOVE. 

A man once said that no person gets mad at a blind man for bumping into him. Instead, they just give that blind man directions and show him the way. I mean, who gets mad at a blind man right?? Right now, there are many people in this world who are blind - or walking in darkness, and when they “bump" into us our response can be either be love or offense. We can either get mad, get even, or be kind. After all, they can't see. Jesus says in Luke 17:1 that offenses are bound to come, but we have to remember that being offended is a decision. One preacher used to say it like this: You can’t stop a bird from pooping on your head, but you can stop him from building a nest in your hair. We are encouraged to walk in love in every situation and scenario (Matthew 22:39). The problems in our life come when we decide to pick and choose when we will walk in love, and who is worthy of receiving our love. I'm sure glad that God didn't pick and choose who is worthy of His love... But that's a discussion for another post. 

Recently I had my own run in with offense. I had a choice to make. Was I going to let this situation dictate the rest of my day/week, or would I forgive? Something that I have learned is that offense always comes in through unmet expectations. Since I expected this person to act a certain way, I was then surprised by what they did next. I trusted them and they broke my trust. I believed them and they lied. Have you ever found yourself in that situation? Usually the closer a person is to you, the deeper the offense can go because they have such an intimate access to your heart. Anyone who can love you a lot also has the ability to hurt you a lot. I'm not saying that you should have trust issues. I'm just saying, getting hurt or offended happens. But this one scripture always helps me get right - Ephesians 4:32 "...forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." However, forgiveness can be difficult. So, how do we forgive?